‘Lucifer’ Plans God’s Retirement, But Who’s Plotting in Heaven? (RECAP)

[Warning: The below contains MAJOR spoilers for Lucifer Season 5, Episode 14 “Nothing Lasts Forever.”]

If you have a plan, assume it will all fall apart. That’s the lesson to be learned in “Nothing Lasts Forever” on Lucifer.

With God (Dennis Haysbert) set to retire, somebody needs to take over — and as Lucifer (Tom Ellis) has decided, he’s the right celestial for the job. He does have a bit of support, but he also has some competition, as he’ll figure out by the episode’s end.

As for this installment’s case-of-the-week, Lucifer’s too distracted trying to plan his father’s retirement to truly care, but it does lead to a great dinner out for Lucifer, Detective Chloe Decker (Lauren German), her mother Penelope (Rebecca De Mornay), and God. (The victim was selling endangered fish to a restaurant to try to help with her aquarium’s bills. The owner accidentally killed her when she found out.)

But what does retirement look like for God? Read on to find out.

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Lucifer, the Next God?

Chloe’s big question when Lucifer fills her in on his plans to take over as God: Why? “Because I would be a much better God than my father ever was,” Luci says. He skirts her question about why he wants to be God — he’d been feeling unworthy of her then realized this way he can prove himself — but assures her that it won’t change anything for them. He’ll be there whenever, wherever she needs him and know exactly what she’s thinking.

But Lucifer won’t be getting his dad’s blessing before his siblings find out because God’s holding a retirement party in Los Angeles. There, they learn from Gabriel that Michael (Ellis) has been telling everyone that God’s getting old and losing it. And when the other celestials in attendance find out about Lucifer’s plan to take over, there is a lot of dissension. None of them can run their own kingdoms, the devil points out. Rather than give his blessing or name a successor, however, God makes it clear that he needs a retirement plan first.

In hopes of proving he’s God material, Lucifer works on just that, looking at retirement homes — and even asking the victim’s husband if his God-like wife would have liked any. It’s from that conversation that he decides his dad really needs a new partner (since his wife is in another dimension) and tries to set him up with Chloe’s mother. All that does is leave Chloe worried about her relationship; God admits he didn’t have enough time for his wife when he was working.

John P. Fleenor/Netflix

Lucifer assures her that won’t be the case for him, and even her ex-husband Detective Dan Espinoza (Kevin Alejandro) offers her hope. Not only does he think it makes sense for Lucifer to be God (after the elaborate prank he pulls off in Episode 12), but he’s sure the couple can figure out how to be together, no matter what challenges they face.

Moving On

It’s during a round of golf with his son Amenadiel (D.B. Woodside) that God reveals the source of his “troubles” with his powers: Michael was the first one to call attention to the problem. God hadn’t noticed anything until then, and Amenadiel suggests that just like angels, God may self-actualize and have done this to himself.

Meanwhile, Lucifer realizes he hasn’t been listening to what God wants and calls Gabriel to do him a favor. Then, he calls Amenadiel and God to meet him at Lux and reveals he’s figured out what will make his dad’s retirement fulfilling: the Goddess (Tricia Helfer), who has enough juice for this one visit. (He had Gabriel deliver a message to her in her dimension.)

John P. Fleenor/Netflix

With their dad not really losing his powers, however, Amenadiel thinks he can just keep being God. But God is still retiring — and moving to his ex-wife’s universe. After all the time she spent in his world, it’s his turn to spend some in hers. Neither son wants to see their parents leave, but “nothing lasts forever,” God tells Lucifer, and his son was right at the family dinner: “I could’ve been a better father to you.”

Now that he’s retiring, he has no need for his mysterious ways. “I can say something I’ve wanted to for a long time: I love you, son. And I’m very proud of the man you’ve become,” God says. With last farewells, God and Goddess leave for her dimension. As for his successor, well, that’s not up to him.

That’s Mazi-Queen to You

After breaking Eve’s (Inbar Lavi) heart because she’s too scared to lose her, the demon Maze (Lesley-Ann Brandt) worries that now that she has a soul, she’ll end up in Hell — as one of the tortured, not a torturer. And that breakup will be her Hell loop. She sets out to try to change that…by trying to kill a puppy. (And she can’t do it.)

But since Lucifer’s going to become God, Amenadiel suggests she just have him change the rules of Hell for her. She has a better idea: She wants Lucifer to change who can sit on the throne in Hell. Lucifer can’t think of anyone he’d trust more with their old home, so they toast to Mazikeen, Queen of Hell.

John P. Fleenor/Netflix

A Blessing in Disguise

Forensic scientist Ella Lopez (Aimee Garcia) turns to Dr. Linda Martin (Rachael Harris) about her concerns regarding the darkness inside of her. For example, when she saw a guy about to walk into traffic, her first thought wasn’t to help him, but how he’d die. Linda suggests that not taking a day off since finding out her boyfriend was a serial killer is catching up to her, but Ella admits she’s been like this her entire life. Darkness is just part of who she is.

Noticing she’s struggling, God assures Ella that everyone has darkness in them. What matters is accepting it, not getting rid of it. Though she worries she’s a bad person, he tells her that the darker the darkness, the brighter the light — and she shines very brightly. He can see it all the way from Heaven. That helps, even though she still doesn’t know he’s really God.

A Major Recurring Problem

After finding out from her mother that she and her father were taking turns following their dreams — her acting, him becoming a detective — Chloe decides to take a page from her book and support Lucifer in his endeavors. She’s going to quit the LAPD, she tells him. But the angel Remiel (Vinessa Vidotto) has some bad news that may throw a wrench in their plan: Michael has been gathering support for his bid to be God. The good news is Remiel hates him even more than Lucifer, so she’ll be the devil’s spy.

John P. Fleenor/Netflix

But the really bad news is Gabriel was up to more than just delivering a message to the Goddess in her dimension. She also retrieved Azrael’s blade, which can kill celestials, for Michael.

Lucifer, Season 5B, Streaming Now, Netflix