Best Lines of the Week (June 18-24): ‘I Still Have No Idea What He Does’

Conan O'Brian s11ep57 Jordan Schlansk
TBS

This week on TV had us running, screaming, and gagging for more! Rick and Morty returned for another chaotic adventure through interdimensional space, Pause with Sam Jay tackled children and the village it takes to raise them, and the series premiere of You, Me & My Ex brought real-life love triangles into the same living space.

On the other hand, Conan said goodbye to his late-night show after 28 years, while we said hello to the new contenders for the RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars Hall of Fame.

Scroll down for the lines we can’t forget from TV this week.

Mythic Quest 209 Rob McElhenney Scaled David Hornsby
Apple TV+

Mythic Quest (Apple TV+)

David: “You guys want to hang now or…?”

Ian: “Right now we got a lot of work to do but um, awoooooo!”

—David (David Hornsby) tries to hang out with his Mythic Quest family after his engagement proposal is rejected, only to be sadly rejected again by Ian (Rob McElhenney).

Dave 203 Andrew Santino
FX

Dave (FX)

“Roommates are kicking him out? No one’s dad should have roommates.”

—Mike (Andrew Santino) talks on the phone with his sibling about their dad moving in with them.

Rick and Morty 501 Beth Jerry Morty Mr. Nimbus Wine
Adult Swim

Rick and Morty (Adult Swim)

“Do you see this whisper kitchen Frasier bulls**t you’re making me do? Morty, get the wine. Beth and Jerry, stop trying to f**k Nimbus.”

—Rick (Justin Roiland) scolds his family for distracting him from meeting with his rival and God of the ocean, Mr. Nimbus. 

Pause With Sam Jay 105 Pregnant Studs Chris Redd
HBO

Pause With Sam Jay (HBO)

“I would not enjoy me pregnant as a stud. If I get pregnant as a stud, I’m hiding in Paris.”

—Sam Jay contemplates what it means to be a parent, whether she would ever have a kid, and her resistance towards being a pregnant stud with SNL cast members Chris Redd and Chloe Fineman.

MasterChef 1104 Aaron Sanchez
FOX

MasterChef (FOX)

“You have this really beautiful Cadillac of a fish, and then you cheapened it with trying to blowtorch a cucumber.”

—Judge Aarón Sánchez expresses his dismay after a contestant screwed up a dish.

RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars 601 Ginger Minj Kylie Sonique Love
Paramount+

RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars (Paramount+)

“B*tch, you are shaped like a deep breath.”

—Kyle Sonique Love reads fellow contestant Ginger Minj in the inaugural ‘Reading is Fundamental’ mini challenge, inspired by the documentary Paris is Burning

Loki 103 Sylvie Loki Drunk
Disney+

Loki (Disney+)

Sylvie: “You’re drunk.”

Loki: “No, I’m full, but bear in mind I am very full.”

—Loki (Tom Hiddleston) defenders his extra behavior after being admonished by Sylvie (Sophia Di Martino).

Miranda Cosgrove as Carly Harper in iCarly
Paramount+

iCarly (Paramount+)

“Now she’s my BFSS—Best Friend Since Sam.”

—Carly (Miranda Cosgrove) reminisces on meeting her roommate, Harper (Laci Mosley), to whom Carly is her BFUMCER (Best Friend Unless My Cousin Ever Resurfaces).

 

You Me & My Ex 101 Jerry Vase
TLC

You Me & My Ex (TLC)

“I’ve been incredibly stressed getting the house ready. I haven’t had a bowel movement in a day. It’s a good sign, maybe I’m a little stressed.”

—Jerry talks about how nervous he is about getting the house ready for his girlfriend to move in with his ex-wife and their kids.

Conan O'Brian s11ep57 Jordan Schlansk
TBS

Conan (TBS)

“Anyway, this guy has worked for me for 26 years, and I’m honest with you, I’m being so honest with you, I still have no idea what he does for my show.”

Conan O’Brien on his associate producer, Jordan Schlansky